No abuse, but no partnership either

Even when he isn't being ordering or cranky or calling me names and telling me what I am doing and what I am thinking as if he can read my mind, it still doesn't seem like he knows I am there.

From the beginning of our marriage, there was no sense of partnership, no sense of 'we'. I was struck by Patricia Evans saying that in a verbally abusive marriage, the couple doesn't really plan together. The man won't.

I don't even get a honeymoon period between abusive episodes. The best it gets, with rare exceptions, is nothingness. When I realized I now think of the absence of contact as an improvement, I feel very sad. How in the hell did I get stuck in this? Excellent question. We'll take that up later.

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