Saturday, March 15, 2008

No abuse, but no partnership either

Even when he isn't being ordering or cranky or calling me names and telling me what I am doing and what I am thinking as if he can read my mind, it still doesn't seem like he knows I am there.

From the beginning of our marriage, there was no sense of partnership, no sense of 'we'. I was struck by Patricia Evans saying that in a verbally abusive marriage, the couple doesn't really plan together. The man won't.

I don't even get a honeymoon period between abusive episodes. The best it gets, with rare exceptions, is nothingness. When I realized I now think of the absence of contact as an improvement, I feel very sad. How in the hell did I get stuck in this? Excellent question. We'll take that up later.

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2 comments:

free2beme said...

OMG... I am sooo happy that I found your blog. I have been searching for blogs like this and I am going through basically the same thing with this husband of mine. This is the only one that I have found that expresses what I am going through.

jennie said...

I'm glad you found it too free2beme.

Sometimes it can really help to know that other people are dealing with the same craziness.

 
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